


The Right-Hand Man

by snormoustache



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Canon Compliant, M/M, Reincarnation, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-07
Updated: 2021-02-26
Packaged: 2021-03-12 12:22:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,612
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29260422
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/snormoustache/pseuds/snormoustache
Summary: The world of ‘Attack on Paradis’ is a virtual reality show. Every character is a real person whose consciousness was uploaded into the simulation. When Levi wakes up after his death, he finds himself rich and famous, surrounded by his family in a peaceful world. He now has everything he needs to be happy. Except for what he wants the most: Erwin Smith.
Relationships: Levi & Erwin Smith, Levi/Erwin Smith
Comments: 3
Kudos: 60





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I’m not ready for the manga to end, and this is my therapy  
> 

Red seas, yellow skies. A silence that kills. A flash of light, so bright it hurts. I know that my eyes are shut but I still can see, I see everything. I fall down, bury my face in the sand. That’s nice. The sand is soft. I dig deeper and deeper to escape from the light. “Come on, Levi,” I tell myself.  
“Levi, you have to open your eyes now.” I hear a familiar voice.  
“Come on, baby, you can do it.” A woman speaks. “I’m here.”  
“Mum?” My body falls still. I didn’t even notice I’d been wriggling like a worm on these sheets. Huh? How do I know I’m in bed?  
“That’s right, baby, open your eyes.”  
It takes me all I have to open my eyes, but what I see is worth the effort. The beautiful Kuchel with a full face, pink cheeks and the whitest teeth he’d ever seen, is smiling at him.  
“I’m so proud of you.” She nearly chants. “So, so proud of you.”  
I reach my hand to touch her, to prove myself that the woman in front of me is real. She places her hands above mine, they’re cold but her face is hot. She breathes heavily and I can’t help but ask:  
“Am I dead?”  
I hear a chuckle. I don’t need to turn my head to know who sits in the chair in the back of the room. Somehow I just know there is a chair in the back of the room.  
“Yo, Levi! Does this look like death to you?”  
I look around. White ceiling, grey tulle on the window. It would be white in the afterlife.  
“Kenny, please get the doctor.”  
He mutters something under his breath, but gets up and leaves the room. The door slams loudly behind him, and I flinch. Kuchel hurries to shut the window.  
“I don’t want you to catch a cold in this draft!” She exclaims with such a caring expression on her face that I can’t help but smile. A warm feeling spreads all over my chest as memories flow inside my head. In the blink of an eye I see her baking cakes for my birthdays, helping me out with homework, singing me to sleep. I see Kenny coming over every weekend, sometimes alone, sometimes with a girlfriend, but it’s a new girlfriend every time.  
It is humiliating, but I can’t control myself. I burst out sobbing and wailing, trying to hide my ugly red face under the blanket.  
“This is quite a normal reaction.” I hear a quiet voice. “Everyone cries after leaving Paradis behind.”  
“I didn’t cry.” Kuchel protested. Kenny concurred.  
“You barely spent a week in the simulation, miss Ackerman. With all due respect, mister Ackerman, you were done with the simulation only four months later. Captain Levi… My apologies, I am a big fan of the show.” The doctor corrected himself. “Levi… spent nearly eighteen months in the simulation. In the meantime, it felt like thirty five years to him.”  
“So what should we do? Should he stay here?”  
“He needs time to adjust to the real world. The best you can do for him right now is be with him.”  
I couldn’t bear listening to them any longer.  
“Tch.” I threw off the blanket and sat up. “There’s no need to babysit me. I know exactly who I am.”  
“Wonderful! In fact, this is one of the questions on my checklist. We need to know it’s perfectly safe to send you back home.”  
The name is Levi. He is twenty nine years old. He ran a tea shop for nearly ten years but had to file for bankruptcy after a fire destroyed it. But he must certainly be a millionaire now.  
“Am I a millionaire yet?” Levi looked at his mother.  
She gave him a cheeky smile.  
“You are.”

***  
“Alright, Levi. Repeat the plan one more time.”  
“Are you kidding me? Kenny, even a mindless titan wouldn’t make a mistake in that shitty plan of yours.”  
“Now!” He showed his teeth, and for a split second became Kenny the Ripper once again.  
“You go first, mother follows you, I follow mother. I don’t look around, she opens the car door for me, I get in. She takes the front seat, Kenny drives us home.”  
“Maybe you should put these glasses on too, sweetie.” Kuchel withdrew a pair of aviator sunglasses and placed them on his nose. “And pull the hood over your head.”  
“Can’t we just leave through the back door?”  
“No. You must be seen. The world must know you’ve left the show. That’s the rule.”  
Levi hissed but didn’t say anything back. Kenny opened the door.  
“By the way, Levi…” He turned around. “There’s someone waiting for you in the limousine. It’s a surprise.”  
Levi felt a knot in his stomach. Is it who he thinks it is? That would be such a cheap and cruel trick. He wasn’t ready for it. He wasn’t ready for this world, the world beyond the studio that greeted him with a wave of high pitched screams. What was going on? Was he back in Liberio?  
“There he is!”  
“Where?”  
“Levi!”  
“Keep on walking, Levi! Follow me!”  
“Dressed in all black!”  
“We love you, Levi!”  
“Red sneakers!”  
“Levi, look at me, Levi!”  
The door shut and muted the world. Levi breathed out heavily, taking the sunglasses off.  
“I see you’re popular as ever.”  
Levi couldn’t help but smile.  
“Good to see you, four eyes.”  
Their hug was brief. He broke it first, and hurried to put the glasses back on.  
“Here.” Hange offered him a paper napkin.  
Levi wiped his cheeks and forced another smile.  
“You haven’t changed much.”  
Hange was dressed in a black suit with a white top, her hair tied in a half ponytail and she wore makeup.  
“I barely get recognised on the streets though. You’d be surprised to see what a difference contact lenses can make.” She chucked, and Levi couldn’t help but smile too. It had been ages since they could just sit and talk.  
“About that…” Levi lowered his voice, even though the rear compartment was separated by the glass window. “How much do they know?”  
When Levi signed the contract he believed he would be no different from any average reality show participant. Forget your real life. Survive for as long as you can. If you’re unlucky, you might get eaten alive. If you’re very unlucky, you might get tortured so badly you’d wish you were eaten alive. Levi was ready for any outcome as long as he was getting paid. He wasn’t ready for the pain caused by love, and the pain caused by losing that love.  
“Who? Oh, them?” She pointed at the crowd of fans disappearing behind them. “Pretty much everything. And yet nothing at all.”  
“What do you mean?”  
“It’s hard to explain… You see what people say and do, but you don’t know what they think… What they feel…”  
“You know what I mean. Do they know?”  
Hange looked away.  
“They don’t know for sure, but some of them suspect there was something going on between you and… him.”  
Levi sighed and rubbed his eyes under the glasses, accidentally ripping them off his face.  
“Hange… Where is Erwin?”  
She looked away, unable to withstand the intensity of his gaze.  
“Levi… Erwin… He’s been out for over four years… I mean, technically, only six months, but it felt like four years to us, so I say four years…”  
The muscles tightened on Levi’ neck.  
“Did something happen to him?” He interrupted her.  
“Nothing happened, Levi. He just moved on.”


	2. Chapter 2

The grey rooftops are wet after the first summer shower. Levi takes a deep breath. One day he will leave the polluted capital. He will move to the countryside where the air is fresh, and the soil is rich.  
Suddenly, an image pops up in his head: sunrise above a forest bungalow, the light just started to seep into the room. He feels warm and safe, the bed sheets smell of wind. He opens the eyes and smiles because Erwin is there, with him, and he is there to stay.  
“Go away,” Levi thinks angrily to himself. He cannot stand the ache in his chest anymore.  
“Nice view, Hange.” He closes the window.  
“Thanks! We don’t really pay attention to it though. Viruses won’t study themselves!” She loudly responds from across the room.  
Moblit nods. There is too much work in their department. Luckily, Hange’s earnings from the show will sponsor numerous research projects and attract new people.  
“Are you sure I can be visiting you? I’m honestly terrified of breaking something in here.”  
“Everyone experiences slight problems with coordination and balance after Paradis.” Moblit gives him a polite smile. Hange snorts.  
“Yes! Yesterday I caught myself thinking it would be nice to use the ODM gear again… But then I realised there is no way this body could do what we used to do in the simulation.”  
Levi forces a smile. A sudden flashback intrudes his thoughts. The smell of dirt and blood. The screams. The heat. He shakes his head.  
“I’d better be going.”  
Hange stands up to show him out.  
“You can drop by anytime, you know? Give me a bath or something.”  
Moblit stops typing and glances at them, his mouth open in surprise.  
“You really used to bathe Hange?”  
Levi jokingly rolls his eyes.  
“Let bygones be bygones.”  
“Did you try to call him?” Hange quietly asked as he is about to exit the office.  
“What’s the point? I heard he’s in the Arctic doing whatever an archaeologist does.”  
“You need to hear his voice, Levi. I don’t want his skeleton to be the last memory you have of him.”  
Levi glares at her. There was no reason for her to do that to him.  
“Don’t you worry, It’s not.”  
“Levi, you gave up on your happiness once, you don’t have to do it twice.”  
Damn you, four-eyes.  
“Do you mean Erwin or yourself?”  
His words leave Hange red-faced and oddly still. Levi instantly feels remorseful for this outburst.  
“I’ll see you around. I promise.”  
Walking down the university corridor, Levi feels Hange’s glare at him. He doesn’t look back.  
He tries to not think, empty his head and just wander about. Titans, death, pain, it was all behind. It was all unreal after all.  
Levi is handling this world pretty well, or at least he thinks he is handling it well. He eats a lot, smiles a lot and spends a lot of time with the people he had forgotten during his time on Paradis.  
Once, only once, he almost snaps at Kenny when the smirking bastard makes a remark about the way Levi holds his teacup. Later that day, with no one around, Levi stares at the cup and tries to grab it by the handle. But it still feels unnatural, as if he is about to break it.  
Levi doesn’t want the cup to break. Levi doesn’t want to break down. He doesn’t want to lie awake at night in a large bed, in a large room, in the mansion that Kuchel was renting. He grows tired of counting sheep and repeats “I’m not captain Levi anymore, I’m not captain Levi” time and time again, only to realise that he, in fact, never was captain Levi. It was all a simulation, a game. But then why does it feel like he lost a part of himself?  
Levi tries not to get lost in his thoughts, so he gets lost in the city. He walks for hours a day but every time he ends up in the same place. On a narrow street with a two floor bakery that faces the windows of a certain thirty-four-year-old archaeologist and former history teacher.  
The ease with which he was able to find Erwin's address was astonishing. Levi's read every single forum about Erwin, saved every single photograph in a secret, password-protected folder on his smartphone. He now carries them around just like he has been carrying his love for Erwin through all these years.  
And yet Levi cannot find the courage to dial the phone number Hange gave him, and hear Erwin’s voice. It seems like such a petty thing to do. Erwin's voice, what can it do to Levi? Can a drop of water save a man dying of thirst in the middle of a desert?  
Levi orders a slice of carrot cake and takes a seat near the window. He imagines being in the building across the street, being with him. Maybe once Erwin is back from the expedition, he’ll pay him a visit and tell him… tell him what? That he loves him? That he is the best man Levi has ever known in this and any other lives? Beg him to let Levi into his life?  
“That will be all, thank you.”  
Levi’s heart flutters. He is a fool, he knows it now.  
Carefully, he turns around and glances at the man at the counter. The tall, blond man in beige trousers and white shirt with sleeves rolled up to the elbows. Instinctually, he follows the man. He tries to remain unnoticed. Down the stairs, across the street, into the building the front door of which is never closed.  
In the darkness of the stairwell, the blond man stops. So does Levi.  
“Am I imagining things or you really are following me?”  
Levi doesn’t reply. He’s been caught red-handed. Almost.  
Erwin puts down the bag from the bakery and slowly turns around, his hands half-risen.  
Levi takes a step forward, then another one. He reaches to Erwin’s shoulder, but the bigger man catches his arm and forces him forward, piercing Levi against the wall. The hood falls off Levi’s head, he smiles at the expression on Erwin’s face. It is a look of genuine surprise and childlike joy, and he is just a million times better than any picture.  
“Levi…”  
At the sound of his name Levi feels as if he fell into a bath of hot water. “What if I kiss him now?” he thinks. Levi’s heart beats so hard it hurts. Erwin is so close and so warm, and so overwhelmingly alive, and there is nothing Levi would want to do more than lean forward and kiss him.  
So he does.


	3. Chapter 3

It was the thirtieth expedition outside the walls. By that time, Levi and Erwin had already established an unspoken agreement: Erwin leads the formation, Levi joins him from the left. Every scout already knew that Levi had proven himself worthy of the Commander’s trust. But Levi had the chance to prove himself once again, when the titans arose from under the ground, their sleep disturbed by the rumbling horses. One by one, Erwin watched the members of his squad meet their fate until he realised that Levi had been slashing every titan that reached for Smith. He looked up: Levi was moving onto the next target, using too much gas, as always. So Erwin aimed for the nearest tree, and intercepted Levi mid air. Together they landed on the thickest branch of a giant pine. They breathed heavily, adrenaline rushing through the veins.   
For a long few moments Erwin watched the titans prowling on the ground, but then he turned his gaze to Levi, pressed against the rough black bark of the pine. From the way his eyes darkened, Levi understood: Erwin knew. And he wanted it too.  
Levi pulled Erwin closer, as close as he could, and held on so tight it hurt. Their kiss was like a fight that neither could win. As they paused to breathe, Erwin gently grabbed the buckle on Levi’s belt, an unspoken question in his eyes. Levi nodded.   
The commander, for the second time in their lives, knelt before Levi, turning him around. The world exploded as Levi felt the softness of Erwin’s tongue between his thighs. “If anyone saw me right now,” Levi thought abruptly, not being able to finish that sentence in his mind. He couldn’t even imagine what he looked like, in fact, he had forgotten what he looked like, where he was and what his name was.   
A moment or an eternity passes by and Levi hears Erwin's whisper: “I want to look at you.” The next thing he knows, Levi's legs are wrapped around Erwin’s waist. The Commander whispers something else, something about the day they met, but the meaning of the words cannot reach Levi's fuzzy mind. He can only ask for more, moaning the words of approval, repeating “Yes, that’s exactly how I want it.”  
“Erwin,” Levi finishes with the name on his lips. It’s an enchantment, a magic spell. It’s a once in a lifetime feeling, Levi knows that for sure, and Levi will tell him, he will tell Erwin, only if manages to open his eyes.   
The very next moment, Levi is already inside wall Sina. He should be shocked but he isn’t. Erwin must have summoned the horses, he must have found their way back to the walls. Levi doesn’t care. His head is empty, he wants to sleep, but Levi knows that another sleepless night awaits him.  
“You ought to eat something, you know.” Hange insists when they return to the barracks, and Levi reluctantly agrees.   
Erwin is late to the midnight dinner, but makes it on time for the toasts dedicated to the fallen. He takes the seat opposite to Levi, but looks anywhere but at him.  
“You never did this before.” Levi finally says, when Hange goes to get another pint.  
“I thought it would be appropriate since I can’t really take you out… you know, on a date.” Erwin half smiles, Levi hopes that the expression on his face doesn’t change. He wouldn’t dare to look happy after such a bloody expedition, but he lets his heart blossom and sing. 

***

The front door slams, the two men pull away. Erwin looks around, but it seems that the person who just entered the building decides to wait for the lift.   
Erwin makes a gesture for Levi to follow him. As they enter Erwin’s flat, Levi stays by the front door. Erwin takes a step back to have a good look at him.  
“You’re tall!” Erwin exclaims.  
“Tch. Haven’t been underfed in this life.” Levi decides not to mention that he still is shorter than Erwin. He doesn’t care. “In fact, I’m quite fond of food.”  
Levi stands still, trying not to make any movements. He’s not sure why.  
“I’m sorry for the mess!” Erwin sounds apologetic, putting the bag from the baker on the table in the middle of the room. “Can I offer you some tea?”  
Levi agrees.  
“Do you still like black tea? I must have some earl grey somewhere.”  
“It’d better be good.” Levi speaks louder as Erwin disappears in the kitchen.   
A moment later he hears the sound of porcelain breaking, and Erwin quietly cussing. Levi rushes to help him, but Erwin already stands in the doorway, blocking the entrance to the kitchen.   
“I still have some trouble… navigating in space… you know?”  
Whatever you say, Erwin.  
“I have a long list of things I want to tell you.” Levi finally says after a long pause.   
“Levi… I… You did everything right.”  
Erwin is about to say something else but the noise of his phone ringing pierces the atmosphere. His face darkens as he sees the caller ID.  
“I really have to pick it up… It’s about an expedition…”  
As Erwin returns to the kitchen to talk, Levi can’t help but wander around the living room. He is curious about everything, he wants to touch everything in the room, explore this new world of Erwin. Instead he orders himself to count the number of books in the bookcase.   
“I’m sorry!” Erwin returns with the tea. He puts two cups on the wooden table, they leave two circles on the surface, but Levi doesn’t say anything. “It’s an important call, we’ve been looking for funding for months. It seems that things are finally… getting going!”  
“I thought you’re supposed to be on an expedition right now.” Levi notices that Erwin looks at his fingers above the cup, at the way he holds it.   
“Yeah, I lied about that. No one camps outside of my flat if there’s no one inside.”  
“Why don’t you just move somewhere they don’t know?”  
Erwin frowns.  
“But I like it here.”  
Levi liked it here too.   
“Do you remember the way you died?”  
Erwin barely touches his tea. When he looks at Levi, he looks next to him.   
“No. But I’ve… seen it. Do you remember the way your story ended?”  
Levi shakes his head.   
“Listen, Erwin…”  
The phone rings again. That shitty phone of his.  
“Levi…”  
“Pick it up, don’t mind me.”   
Erwin picks up the phone and walks around the room, saying numbers, places, names of people he was about to hire. He talks about books, equipment and says some words Levi doesn’t even understand. Engaged by the conversation, Erwin walks back into the kitchen. Levi wonders why the sound of Erwin’s voice doesn’t make the person on the other side of the line give him anything Erwin wants. That’s what Levi would do. Anything to make Erwin happy. The conversation lasts five minutes, ten. And then it strikes Levi.   
Erwin doesn’t need him anymore.   
Levi knows that he is still the same, this Erwin, his Erwin. But the world around them is very different, Erwin’s world is different. And there is no place for Levi anymore.  
“Levi, I’m so sorry, if only so many people didn’t depend on…” Erwin gasps, staring at the empty chair. He walks around the flat, stupidly checking every room, but the empty white teacup is the only proof that Levi ever was there. Erwin growls in frustration and punches the wall. Real life or not, there are things he just can’t ever do right.


	4. Chapter 4

“Basically, we just looked for interesting life stories. I had the main plot line in mind when we auditioned the actors but it’s the individual characters that made the show so unique.” Ymir Fritz, the executive producer, speaks calmly to the audience. The Writer nods along.  
“Precisely. My duty was merely to create the circumstances in which our crew could thrive. For instance, I had never imagined Zoë as a main character before she joined the Survey Corps. No offence.” He lifts his arms defensively in the air. Soft laughter echoes through the hall. “But it is her innate curiosity and passion for research that really moved the plot forward. She wanted to go outside the walls, she wanted to study the titans. I find it fascinating.”  
“We also supported them in any way we could.” Ymir adds. “Take Ilse’s notebook.”  
“A choice with no regrets.” The Writer smiles.  
Levi’s eyebrows shoot up.  
“What do you mean?!”  
“Well, Levi. When I met you two years ago I thought there was something odd about your story. You struck me as a headstrong, purposeful person, unfit for the simple life you were leading at the time. The path you took in the Underground proved me right. I knew I had to place you in the Survey Corps but it took me a while to arrange your meeting with Erwin.”  
Hange kicks Levi’s leg under the table. Erwin, who sits between Hange and Miche, notices that and gives her a side eye. There is no need to embarrass themselves in front of some hundred people and cameras, especially on the promo tour of the show’s grand finale.  
“That makes sense.” Levi says calmly but can’t help but feel betrayed. How much of their story was staged? Was he manipulated into being Erwin’s war dog, right-hand man, lover? Levi feels sick. Memories flow in his mind, Levi drowns in emotions as he remembers the countless nights spent by Erwin’s side. His candlelit face, the fine light hairs on his arms, the outline of his back, the curve of his mouth as Levi begs him to get some rest.  
“With you,” Erwin replies and they lie down together, skin to skin, in Erwin’s narrow bed. Was all of that intended? Was it really a carefully executed plan?  
So what if it was, Levi decides a moment later. That doesn’t mean it wasn’t real.  
“I have a question for mister Ackerman.”  
The voice from the public brings him back to reality.  
“Go ahead.” This time Levi’s smile is genuine.  
“How does it feel to see mister Smith again?”  
Strange. It’s strange to see his face, to hear his voice.  
“It feels natural.”  
“And how does it feel for you, mister Smith?”  
“A bit nostalgic, I suppose.” The ex-Commander gives the young woman with the microphone a smile. Her face turns crimson red, she thanks the men for their replies and hurries to disappear in the audience.  
Nostalgic? What’s that supposed to mean? That he belongs in the past? The warmth in Levi’s chest disappears giving way to the heavy, gloomy despair he got accustomed to over the past few weeks. Levi decided he should better get used to feeling like shit all day, every day. What was the point of all that money he gained if he can’t buy what he wants the most? What’s the point of travelling all over the world if there is only one place he wants to be, and it’s by Erwin’s side. Oh well, at least mother is happy now.  
“Mister Smith, I recently read that you participated in the show to gain some money for your wedding. Well, could you please tell us more about the upcoming event? Your fiancée has not been seen in public since your awakening and we are all very curious.”  
The sound of Erwin’s tense laughter is one that makes Levi cringe. He hates himself for the dark thoughts in his head, but deep down inside Ackerman knows it is true: it was easier when Erwin was dead. Because then he could still dream about a new, different life together. Levi was robbed of that dream by this new, different life.  
“She is doing well, thanks for asking.”  
Erwin says something else, but Levi does not listen. He is too busy imagining a tall, long haired, full-figured woman standing next to Erwin, his Erwin, touching his hands, smiling at him. Erwin smiles back. Levi wants him to stop smiling, Levi wants him to suffer as much as Levi suffers himself, but he cannot imagine hurting Erwin. So he imagines the way he could hurt this woman instead: he grabs her by the hair, rips off her arms, and she screams and…  
“Levi, it’s time for lunch. Let’s go.”  
Thank god for Hange. If it wasn’t for her, Levi would still be hiding in the mansion, polishing the shiny hardwood floors and wiping the invisible dust off every piece of furniture he owned. A week after the impromptu meeting with Erwin, she finds Levi in his room, doing crunches on a green cashmere carpet.  
“So you’re a hermit now, huh?” She closes the door and looks around.  
“Well, hello to you, too.”  
She falls, fully clad, on the bed that stands in the middle of the room. Levi threatens her life - who the hell lies in bed with clothes on? - she laughs but moves to the carpet. Levi continues his workout, trying to appear undisturbed when she asks about Erwin.  
“Are you sure you’re still the same person? Have you forgotten that going over our shortcomings and bitching about our situation is an important ritual?”  
Levi sits up and stares at her in disbelief. She’s right.  
“I’m in love with Erwin.” He finally says. “I fucking love him.”  
The titan doctor makes a surprised face.  
“What else is new?” She, as always, exaggerates.  
“Hange, you don’t get it!” Levi stands up and starts walking in circles. “I joined that show because my life, everything about my life was so boring and so… ordinary. When that fire happened and I lost my shop I felt like it was a sign…”  
“Lost your shop?! Did you have insurance?!”  
“Yeah, yeah. Listen, it was a chance, an opportunity to change something. So I did and you know how things turned out and I met him, and…” Levi catches his breath. “Hange, being there, with Erwin, following him is the only thing that ever felt right. What am I supposed to do now that I don’t have an excuse to be close to him?” He then adds quietly: “I don’t even know if he’s into men. It didn’t matter back then, in the corps… We just shared the little time we had. But now…”  
Hange sighs.  
“Frankly, I think you’re right. He’s not… into men. He’s into you.” She stares right at him. “Erwin loves you, Levi, how can you doubt that?”  
He can only grimace in return.  
“You know, he actually had my number this whole time but never tried to reach me until I did.”  
Levi hands her his smartphone and disappears in the ensuite bathroom. She hears the water run and reads the text on the white screen:  
“Levi,  
I’m sorry for what happened.  
You were right, our role did end in Shiganshina.  
Please be happy.  
Your biggest fan.”  
The first time Levi reads these words he is angry. His first impulse is to return to that flat and demand an explanation. But then he reads it over and over again, imagining Erwin typing those letters, saying those words, and he just feels sorry for himself, for his pathetic shitty self, until self-pity turns into self-hate. “Erwin has never been wrong.” Levi reminds himself. So he simply replies “I’ll trust your judgement” and decides to try and find another reason to live. That should’t be too hard. If a piece of shit like Zeke Yeager can do it, so can Levi.  
The Monkey catches Levi’s stare and jokingly waves at him as the cast approaches the cafeteria. Levi nods back to the blond bastard, who showed up on stage wearing a pink shirt with flowers, khaki trousers and white socks with sandals. His beard is almost as long as his hair that reaches the shoulders. He looks ridiculous, Levi can’t help but make a joke about rejecting humanity and returning to the roots. Zeke laughs and half hugs his former rival, they walk on together.  
“You have a murderous look, you know.” Hange whispers into Erwin’s ear. “You wanted him to move on, so what’s your deal?”  
Erwin frowns and takes a seat at the table with Miche, Nanaba and Gelgar. Levi watches them on the sly, they all look happy. It makes Levi feel somewhat happy too. Mister Ackerman, as everyone calls him now, spends lunchtime manoeuvring between tables, chatting to his ex-comrades, the people who still remained his friends. Zeke Yeager follows him around but Levi doesn’t mind. The hippie man is not the same person anymore but when he jokingly makes the “dedicate your heart” salute Levi can’t help but scowl: “Do this again and I’ll kill you.” Miche overhears their conversation and smirks in approval.  
“It’s time for you to meet the fans,” humanity’s second strongest reminds him and directs Levi towards the room where Hange and Erwin wait on him.  
“Erwin.” Levi finally acknowledges his presence.  
“Levi.” The tall man smiles politely and nods.  
“Here they are!” Hange nearly chants, greeting the first out of the hundreds of people they are about to meet. They all wear the Survey Corps uniform, they all gaze at Levi adoringly, they all notice how tall Levi is. Erwin remains reserved and polite but smiles every time Levi receives a compliment. Hange is the one who talks the most and hugs everyone who enters the room. Except for one man.  
This man is short and stout, his long loop sweater is too tight around the waist. His skin is oily and so is his hair, combed over the balding head. There is something odd about the way he looks at Levi, about the way he moves himself around.  
“You’re my hero, you know. I wish I was as strong as you are.”  
His voice is like a nail on glass. Levi clears his throat.  
“In this world I’m just a regular guy, you know. Pretty boring.”  
“You owe me a photo.” The man whispers. Levi forces himself to move closer, but the strong smell of perfume mixed with body odour makes his head spin.  
“We can pose together.” Erwin suggests, noticing Levi’s discomfort.  
“You love him because he’s handsome, right?” The man points at Erwin. He has thick fingers and long fingernails. “If I were tall and handsome, would you love me too?”  
“What the hell are you…”  
One step back, another one, until Levi hits the wall with his back.  
“Um, can someone…” He hears Hange’s unnaturally high-pitched voice. The guards storm in to take down the assaulter but it is too late. The man has already withdrawn a knife that was hidden somewhere in the depths of his baggy clothes.  
“If I can’t have you, nobody can!”  
A silly thought crosses Levi’s mind as he closes his eyes in a stupor: “I guess that solves my problems.” He hears the knife piercing the flesh, he smells the blood that floats out of the wound. He waits for the pain to come. But it doesn’t and Levi immediately understands what just happened. He reluctantly opens his eyes to the terrifying sight.  
“Not again… Please, not again…” He chokes.  
By his feet, pale-faced, in a pool of blood, lies Erwin Smith.

**Author's Note:**

> TBC


End file.
